so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
I just discovered how perfect a shot glass is for putting your chicken nugget dipping sauces into. Like I'll probably do this when I'm a mother feeding my children.
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
Enjoy the penises
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
