Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
Randomize
