Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
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