i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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