You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
Have you ever felt like autocorrect is judging you with its suggested words? Like how it won't suggest certain words until you type in pretty much the entire word, is it just thinking 'No way did this dude use "consent laws" in the same sentence as "17th?" Or is that just me.
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
Randomize
