i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize
