Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
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