Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
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