If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
my phone is just a graveyard for last nights mistakes. at least it's giving me hints as to where i was though, i'm like carmen sandiego
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
Randomize
