Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
What kind of true American would I be if I didn't just smoke weed in my bathrobe on my back porch in the middle of suburbia on 4/20? #stepmomoftheyear
He couldn't undo my bra. He ended up breaking the clasp he clawed at it so long. We met on Tinder for God sake
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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