i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
Randomize
