1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
Randomize
