Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
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