I want to walk on stilts...naked
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
Oh god. I finally realized why the coked out Stevie wonder was explaining the concept of movember to the McDonalds clerk. Drunk me didn't process that another month comes after Halloween... It's apparently November.
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
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