my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
Randomize
