I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
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