how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
Randomize
