During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize