that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
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