The only reason you're wearing underwear tonight is cause you have a family dinner before
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
Lord give me the strength to not check my tinder messages at my grandmother's wake.
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
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