What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
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