Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Randomize
