Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
Shame - the story of my life.
Randomize
