its not stalking. its research.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
