So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
Fun holiday story for you: Alex and I went out drinking. She left. I needed a ride home. Met this dude and told him to drive my car back. Once at my house, I made him take out my dog and then apologized for not wanting to make out with him. I said, let me go see if my roommate is interested and then I slept in Alex's bed all night.
20 bucks says he was an actual leprechaun
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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