I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
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