Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
May the power of my ass compel you!!
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
