she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Randomize
