It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
Randomize
