i just bought a vibrator and the cashier says "have fun with that." i didnt realise what he said so i responded "you too." and then he gave me his number...
Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
The beers last night were like the tears from god
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
Randomize
