so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
Side Note: Everyone in my office is getting engaged and having baby showers. And I'm all like, fuck your joy, I just want more string cheese in my life.
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
