i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize