Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
Randomize
