yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
Randomize
