i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
Randomize
