Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
third nipple confirmed
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
