i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
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