You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
I think weed is turning my hair brown
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
Randomize
