Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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