eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
Randomize
