when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize
