Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
Randomize