"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
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