based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
Randomize
