i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
Randomize
