I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
my grandpa was trying to put butter into the pepsi and i'm like "grandpa what are you doing" and he looks down and goes "well i guess that wouldn't taste good anyway"
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
Randomize
