she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
My dick has a subreddit
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
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