May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
Randomize
