My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
Randomize
