just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
You passed out across the stairs with your feet and arms through the railings so you "wouldn't fall down when you blacked out and no one could get the pizza past you without waking you up". \n\nYou're the smartest drunk I know.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
Randomize