Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
Randomize
